5 Practical Ways To Show You Love Your Husband

5 Practical Ways To Show You Love Your Husband

Going into marriage, I knew that love would be played out in practical ways within our marriage. However, I had no idea how much the practical side of showing love to my husband would be necessary to keep our marriage running smoothly!

Personally, I am really bad at displaying my love in practical ways to my husband. When it comes to grand displays, I can sometimes nail it but those little gestures that daily remind him how much I really do love him are few and far between it seems.

So, today I am sharing five simple ways that I have found to daily demonstrate my love to my husband in practical ways. Hopefully these will help give you ideas to serve your husband’s more practical needs with love.

Write your husband a few encouraging words.

Two weeks into our marriage, my husband started his new job as a teacher at a new school. Wanting to be a sweet and loving wife, I packed his lunch while he was showering before leaving for his first morning on the job.

But I wanted to do something more. So I grabbed a sticky note and opened my Bible to a favorite verse and recorded it on the sticky note followed a simple “I love you!”

And a new tradition in our marriage was born.

We are almost six years into marriage and with few exceptions, every morning I have written a small note to include in his lunch. Most of them have Bible verses that are currently impacting me so I share these verses with him.

It’s simple and takes less than two to three minutes each morning but it means the world to him. (I found out that he stashes his favorite notes/verses in his desk at work which kind of melted my heart too cause he is not a super sentimental guy that way! 🙂 )

Recharge his electronic devices.

Nothing is more annoying than seeing that your device is almost out of charge. My husband loves to play music on his iPod while he wakes up and gets ready for his day. And it is frustrating when he goes to start his day with music and instead finds a dead iPod.

So, as I go through my day, I like to take a quick peek at his devices and see if they are starting to get low on charge. If they are, I plug them in. Hubby always smiles big when he sees that his music is ready to go first thing in the morning and I love taking care of this little service for him! 🙂

Plan an activity together.

Guys like action. Whether that action is on the screen of their favorite video game or actually climbing a steep mountain trail, guys want to be doing something.

My husband struggles when our dates involve simply sitting still and talking. After a few minutes of stale conversation about the kids, we quickly grow bored. We want to be doing something.

So, plan an activity that you and your spouse can do together. If your husband is into video games, perhaps plan a kid-free night of playing his favorite video games. Right now, my husband and I are into playing board and card games. Some of our favorites include Sushi Go Party, Forbidden Island,Code Names, and Queen’s Architect.

Our marriage benefits from actually doing things together because we share new experiences and make memories. Plus there is the bonus of great conversations that come as we are doing these things together!

Take something off his To-Do List around the house.

Personally, my husband hates yard work, especially mowing. Part of this is due to the fact that we have a huge yard and a free lawn mower that requires a LOT of muscling to get it to work. Part of his complete distaste for yard work comes from the fact that he has terrible allergic reactions to all the dust kicked up while mowing.

Since I simply do not have the muscles necessary to take this particularly repugnant chore off my husband’s hands, I hired a local family looking to make a few extra bucks this past summer. They had equipment much better suited to take care of our yard work and my husband was thrilled that he only had to touch a lawn mower once this entire last year!

Find that one thing that your husband just wishes was never on his chore list and see if you can remove that burden for him. If he is anything like my hubby, he will be super excited to have one responsibility removed from his shoulders!

Communicate with his family.

Before having our two children, I had never once personally texted or called my mother-in-law or sister-in-law. Since we live several hours away from my husband’s family, they were definitely getting left out of the loop and I am ashamed to admit that I had a lot to do with that lack of communication.

Now that we have children, I make a point to be in communication via text, emails, phone calls, letters, and even the occasional FaceTime (now that we are starting to figure out the technology! 🙂 )

While it is easier to just let days slip away without making an effort to talk, God has really convicted me that this needs to be a priority not only for his family’s sake but for his sake as well.

Find ways that you can share your special family moments with your husband’s family if that is something he is open to. Whether you send a weekly email just keeping in touch or text a cute picture or video, let them know that they are a part of your and your husband’s life!

Resources That Might Help You Further

The 5 Love Languages. This book can not be highly recommended enough in learning how to love your spouse in practical ways. Once I realized that my husband primarily speaks the Love Language of Acts of Service, I was able to fill his tank with so much more meaningful and loving gestures.

Your spouse will thank you for reading and implementing everything in this book!

Love & Respect. Along the same lines of The Five Love Languages, Love and Respect shows your husband’s needs for respect and offers practical advice to show him that respect plays out in day to day life. I always recommend that if you read one of these books you should read both of them.

Your Turn

What are some practical ways that you have shown your husband love?

If you like to share your ideas, please leave a comment below! 🙂

Thanks for stopping by!

*This post contains affiliate links to help keep the ministry of Ambitions for Christ in operation. You can read our disclosure policy here. Thanks for your support of this ministry!*

5 Practical Ways To Show You Love Your Husband
5 Practical Ways To Show You Love Your Husband

 

How To Deal With Loneliness Within A Christian Marriage

 

Christian marriage, marriage, loneliness, lonely wife, wifeThis past week marked five years of marriage to my wonderful husband. To be honest, I can’t believe that five years has already gone by! How is that possible? Looking back, it seems to have flown by but there were some periods that felt like they would never end when we were in the midst of them.

As I have reflected on these past five years, I definitely will vouch for the fact that married life is a wonderful gift from God. There is a oneness with my husband that no other human relationship can rival and I love the beauty of our marriage. And I want to make sure you hear that before I say what I am about to say.

Marriage does NOT cure loneliness!

Every person enters marriage with high expectations that are followed by a certain amount of “let-down”as the honeymoon phase of the relationship ends. That’s okay. It is normal to realize that you didn’t marry a perfect person and to realize that you can’t be the perfect person to your spouse either.

One of my highest expectations upon entering marriage was the fact that I was certain I wouldn’t ever feel lonely again. I now have a person who I pretty much will spend 24/7/365 rubbing elbows with. How could I be lonely now?

Then reality hit. First, his crazy teaching/coaching schedule took over certain seasons of our life to the point where I really only saw my husband awake for about 30 minutes a day. (So thankful that season of life has closed and led to a much more family-friendly schedule!)

However, when the schedule was not the issue, there was the issue of miscommunication and differences to be worked through. I couldn’t believe how utterly lonely I was left feeling when my dear husband did not understand my feelings or validate them the way I expected. Feeling of loneliness and frustration would suffocate me even when we were sitting in the same room!

I expected marriage was going to end the battle I had had with loneliness as a single person!

And yet periods of loneliness persisted. Honestly, I think for many wives, just as myself, loneliness stems from misplaced expectations. We expect our husbands to do and be things that no human could ever do or be. For instance, I basically wanted Nick to show characteristics that only God has. You know, things like being all-knowing of my heart and feelings without me having to say a word. The poor man didn’t stand a chance!

Marriage does provide companionship

God created marriage for companionship. In Genesis 2:18 God says, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”

Yes, there are people that God does call to live a life to singleness (such as the apostle Paul.) However, the majority of people have their God-instilled desire for companionship fulfilled largely through marriage. In marriage, we have someone to experience life’s highest and lowest moments with. There is now a person who knows what we look like at our worst and still loves us!

I really want you to grasp this point because while we may have times where we experience loneliness in our marriage relationship we must realize that marriage was created to provide us as companions to each other.

*Right now, I am addressing healthy Christian marriages. If you are in a relationship with a spouse and your source of feelings of loneliness are brought on by verbal or physical abuse, please seek help and counseling!*

Marriage makes us holy!

As Christians, God desires for us to be refined and made to be more like Him. One of the best ways I believe God refines us is by placing us in relationship with other humans, in particular, our spouse!

Before getting married, I believed I was a patient person. A year into marriage, I wondered if I could even consider that a quality I possessed. I was not very patient (or forgiving) towards my husband, especially when he *gasp* still did not return his empty hangers to the proper location! (Oh, it was a very real fight we have had…)

Marriage helps God reveal the best and the worst of our heart’s condition towards other human beings and even towards God Himself. Marriage is a refining fire that is designed to draw us even closer to God!

Final Thoughts

When the times of loneliness start to affect your marriage, take a few minutes to step back and evaluate your expectations. Let God make you aware of the areas that you need to adjust your expectations.

Also, take time to relish the companionship you do have with your spouse. Highlight the areas of strengths in your marriage. Seek to find times where you can nurture your marriage, especially if you have small children at home!

Finally, let God use the ups and the downs of marriage draw you closer to Him! Allow Him to fill in the gaps when your human spouse lets you down. Find your ultimate joy and fulfillment in your relationship with your Savior and Lord.

Your Turn
  • What expectations did you have when you got married that later went unfulfilled?
  • How can you find practical ways to allow times of loneliness to draw you closer to God?
  • What unfulfilled expectations do you need to bring before God and have Him help you forgive your spouse for?
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How to Deal With Loneliness Within a Christian Marriage

Five Ways to Honor the Father of Your Young Children

 “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.”
Exodus 20:12

Why To Honor The Father Of Your Young Kids

Fathers are missing from the picture way too often in today’s world. There is study after study showing how the absence of a father leaves a hole in his children’s lives forever.

So for the dads who decide to play the God-designed role in their child’s life, it is important that they are honored for that decision. Personally, I find this especially true if you are married to a man who is helping you to raise young children.

There is so much to be said for a man who stays present for kids at any age but these young years of childhood can be particularly stressful as kids require so much time and energy from both parents.

Kids are to honor their father and mother. However when kids are little, the decision to honor the father really lays squarely on the mother’s shoulders. (Vice versa is true for fathers to honor the mother of young children but that is not the topic of this post. 🙂 )

So, if you and your husband have young children, here are some basic ideas to help you honor him this year:

Clean something.

Perhaps dad always is the one who cleans the gutters or washes the cars or mows the lawn. Take the responsibility off of his shoulders for a weekend. If you can’t do it yourself, find and hire someone who can do it for you and present it as a gift of loving service to him. He will appreciate the break from the usual grind of chores and to-do lists at home!

Create a magical family evening together.

With young children, it can be hard to enjoy meal times together outside of the home. I mean, by the time you are packed in the car going to the restaurant, everyone is so cranky and tired that it just doesn’t seem worth it. Skip the going out portion and create a meal at home that you can enjoy as a family. Make dad’s favorite foods, clean up the dining room and set a special spread for the man in your life. If your family is like mine, we do eat at home pretty much every meal so find ways to make it different from the other meals you eat at home. Perhaps make a dessert if you normally don’t do so or perhaps pull out the dishes that are normally saved for Thanksgiving. Anything to let Dad know that this meal is about him and special just like he is!

Buy some nice undergarments.

Okay, this one the kids will not be able to help with in any way, shape or form but Dad will appreciate none the less. Find an evening when you two can spend together without the kids. Arrange for the babysitter. Purchase new undergarments that you know hubby would enjoy and wash the sheets in your bedroom (or at least make sure there aren’t any socks or sippy cups hiding in the sheets!) Tell Dad that you are grateful for him being such a great dad to the kids and you want to give him a night off to show him your gratitude for all the ways he helps out.

Create a “Thank You Dad” book.

If your kids are old enough to scribble with a crayon, hand them some colors and let them create masterpieces for dad. If they can talk, have them share a story that you can write down in a booklet. Let them tell Dad their favorite memories together. Don’t forget to include your own favorite stories. If you love watching him read them bed time stories every night, say so in the thank you book!

For an added bonus, print off some pictures of him with the kiddos to include as well. This will be a way your husband can relive great memories years from now and it will express your gratitude to him for being such a great dad.

Make or purchase a meaningful gift.

If cash is short, make Dad a gift. An idea that my husband and I have done for each other include yearly hand print tracings of the kid’s hands that we keep in a scrapbook. It is sweet keepsake to see how they grow and change with each passing year.

Perhaps if cash isn’t so short, consider buying a new amazing t-shirt for dad. Or it could be a nice throw blanket. You know your husband best. Find a gift that will be meaningful to him as a great way to honor and thank him for his great fatherhood skills.

Your Turn

This Father’s Day is a special time to remind your husband the importance he plays by stepping up and being a dad to your kids. However, don’t forget to find times throughout the rest of the year to honor him as well!

How do you plan to honor your husband this year at Father’s Day?

I would love to hear your suggestions and ideas in the comment section!

Thanks for stopping by!

Five Ways to Honor the Father of Your Young Children

*This post contains affiliate links to help keep the ministry of Ambitions for Christ in operation. You can read our disclosure policy here. Thanks for your support!*

Five Ways to Honor the Father of Your Young Children

How Fantasy Football Helped Me Grow Closer to My Husband

Before marrying my husband, I could count the number of times I had watched football on one hand. And those times involved Super Bowl parties with great food and lots of friends to distract me from the mundane activity of actually watching the game.

Then I met my husband Nick. He watched football, talked football, played football, coached football. You get the idea. If a football was involved, he was interested. I can safely say that the number of football games I watched quickly outgrew my fingers and that was just the first couple of months of marriage! 🙂

To be fair, I did find a certain joy in watching Nick coach his young football team. It was obvious Nick was in his element on the sidelines. I even started to follow and understand a few of the basics of the game so I could have a respectable conversation after the game. However, that was about as far as I could say that my football interest grew.

As the past few football seasons passed, Nick would watch his football games on TV once a week (he is great about only watching his team play so it doesn’t hone in on all his free time for which I am VERY grateful!) But I could tell it disappointed him when I would spend all my time doing anything but watching the game with him. He grew up watching each game with his dad and talking and analyzing every play and genuinely enjoying family companionship during those times.

So being the good Christian wife I am, I tried to watch. It usually put me to sleep before the first quarter was over. I just wasn’t excited about keeping track of who was playing or what the defense was lacking that game or how it affected the team’s chances for the playoffs.

Two years ago, Nick suggested I try to set up a Fantasy Football team with him. My first thought was, “What is that?” My second thought was “NOOO!!!” But Nick was so excited about us both having our own team that I agreed to it.

For those out there who were as uninformed about Fantasy Football as I was, basically you pick players from any team to create your own “fantasy” team that plays games each week based on the real players performances in real life. (Confusing enough for you?)

The stats and rankings were interesting to me as Nick guided me through how to draft a team, what positions I needed to consider, and how to check their rankings. Most of my decisions the first time we drafted players was on how much a liked a player’s name. (That is not the most scientific way to play the game, trust me!) 🙂

Each week, I followed my individual players and their stats as we watched the games together. Before I knew it, I wasn’t taking naps near as often during games and I was talking to Nick intelligently about the game. Okay, maybe not super intelligently but he gave me the benefit of the doubt and encouraged my interest none the less! 🙂 Once I won my first game on Fantasy Football, my competitive nature was thrilled and I started to follow football news with Nick. Talk about a change from the previous years of sleeping through all the games!

So what does playing Fantasy Football have to do with being a good Christian wife you might ask? Well, a lot, in fact, as I have learned. My husband doesn’t have many hobbies or interests outside of reading (the very thing that brought us together as a couple!) So to him, it was important that one of the other big areas of his life he was able to share with me. He has supported me in my many crazy hobbies (like Cricut card making, geocaching, piano playing, blogging, etc.) This was my way to engage with him where his interests and passions lay.

Study your husband.

Football obviously interested my husband. I knew that. What took me quite a while to realize was that he wanted to share that interest with me. Take the time to prayerfully study your husband. See what hobbies or activities cause him to light up. You might be surprised at what you find interest your man!

Ask questions.

If your husband is like almost every other human on the planet, he will love to share more about his passions with you-if you ask the right questions at the right time. I have found that if I ask Nick a football related question during the commercial break, he is much happier to explain in detail what I don’t understand. Unlike five minutes earlier when he is zoned in on the most important play of the game. Find appropriate times to seek out your husband’s knowledge on his interests.

Support his interest.

Don’t you love when your hubby lets you have an afternoon to go shopping or to make make crafts uninterrupted or pursue whatever interest you have? Well, return that favor! Perhaps there is a convention nearby that will allow him to learn more about his hobby. Let him go and if he wants, join him too! We all know how the pressures of everyday life can get a person down. It helps to have a supportive wife who will let him pursue quality down time.

Find a way to join him in his interest.

This one can be the hardest. It is one thing to be kind and learn more about his interest or to let him go pursue his hobby, it can be an entirely other thing to join him in doing it. This can lead to sacrifice on your part, both of your own time and even sometimes your own interests. However, keep in mind the words from Philippians 2:4, “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.” This is a the very example Christ Jesus set for us as His followers! Let us bring this Christ-like attitude to our marriages, even to our hobbies and interests.

Growing closer as a couple is hard, especially in the early years of job promotions, young children, educational opportunities, and financial strains. Don’t forget to take time to build your relationship with your spouse in the fun areas of life-even if this means making a Fantasy Football team! 🙂

Resources To Help You Along

The 5 Love Languages This book has done more to help my husband and I connect and show our love to one another than any other book outside of the Bible. We love the practical applications that we were able to make from what we learned through this book!

For Women Only: What You Need to Know About the Inner Lives of Men I read this book during our first year of marriage and it was a HUGE eye opener to me into the thought life of men. Basically, the author interviewed thousands of men in each age category and walk of life and shares her findings from a Christian worldview. By far, the best chapter is when she addresses the fact that men are visual. Her examples throughout that chapter have done more to help me reevaluate how men (mainly my husband) see the world around them! If you only get to read one book on this list, read this one!! (Bonus, it is a super quick and easy read!)

Love & Respect Study Set In full disclosure, I found this book more interesting and helpful than my husband did. The writing style frustrated him as it felt it was talking down to him a little but he said that he still agreed with the general ideas and sentiments that were being put forth. Personally, I enjoyed seeing how the cycle of feeling disrespected and unloved could snowball to a point where neither spouse even wants to try anymore.

Your Turn

How about you? What are some interests your husband has that you have spent shared time with him in the past?

What are some ways you can find to take practical steps to meet your husband where he is at?

Please take a few minutes to share in the comments. I love hearing from my readers!

Thanks for stopping by!

*This post contains affiliate links to help keep the ministry of Ambitions for Christ in operation. You can read our disclosure policy here. Thanks for your support!*

How Fantasy Football Helped Me Grow Closer to My Husband